Joy and Roller Coaster Rides...Hau'oli Makahiki Hou!

Roller Coasters have always been my favorite theme park ride. I remember the way I felt when seeing a roller coaster for the very first time! Where else can we strap ourselves in, (legally) go that fast, flip upside down, come to a screeching halt, without requiring an emergency room visit?

What is so exciting about roller coasters? For me, it is the joy they bring! I’m not sure makes me more joyful. The pictures while on the ride or the ride itself! Can’t you see all the joy on my face in the picture below?

Yes, I know the picture is sideways...kinda gives it that roller coaster effect!

I declare 2012 to be full of more joy! I am so excited about this year! I know God is working things together for our good because He takes pleasure in prospering us as our soul prospers! (Romans 8:28, Psalm 35:27, 3 John 1:2) This year, I will pursue more joy!

What is joy? Joy defined by Strong’s concordance is glee, exceedingly, gladness, fullness, pleasure, rejoicing. Ok, now I’m set! Here’s my plan:

• Imitate Him! (Ephesians 5:1)
• Be stronger! (Nehemiah 8:10)
• Trust Him! (Psalm 5:11)
• Be in His presence! (Psa 16:11)
• Shout! (Psalm 32:11)
• Be a counselor of peace! (Proverbs 12:20)

Even the angels rejoice! (Luke 15:10) As for me and my house, we’re going to rejoice more in 2012!

The LORD our God, the Mighty One, is in our midst! He rejoices over us with singing! (Zephaniah 3:17). He rejoices over us with singing! That give me a headstart!

I pray this is your most joyful year ever!

Hau'oli Makahiki Hou!

This blog is dedicated to three amazing women that God has placed in my life.

Thank you, Gwen Payne. For walking me through the most difficult blog I’ve ever written. Thank you for your wisdom, guidance and sensitivity. When others said I couldn't do it because of the difficulty, you loved me through it. But most of all, thank you for walking out Galations 6:9 before my very eyes over the last several years in everything you do.

Thank you, Tammy Canada. For always loving me over the past twenty six years for who I am at whatever season of life I’m currently walking through. I’ve changed a lot since we first met but your love for me never has. Your heart full of love is beyond anything I could ever ask or think.

Thank you, Cortni Needles. For your loyalty, commitment and encouragement that is completely unfailing. You are a city on a hill.

I'm so grateful to God for you.

During a recent discussion with Gwen, she told me about research she had discovered about "The Twelve Days of Christmas". It is a cumulative song, meaning that each verse is built on top of the previous verses. There are twelve verses, each describing a gift given by "my true love" on one of the twelve days of Christmas.

I believe Christmas is a great time to blog about family and overcoming adversity; however, this blog grew into much more than a quick read. As a result, we decided it best to divide it up into blogs which build on the one before and reveals layers of gifts of deliverance, healing, forgiveness, love, from my true love, the Father. Each gift of deliverance, healing, forgiveness and love increases my spiritual, emotional and physical growth into the full stature of the measure of the fullness of God. (Ephesians 1:23). Thank God for progress!

Out of my conversation with Gwen, The 12 Days of Love was born. God is love. (1 John 4:8) Many are the afflictions of the righteous but He delivers us out of them all. (Psalm 34:19) His love never fails. Over the next twelve days, we will post a blog about how God has walked me through who I am today. It is divided into twelve sections making it easier to digest.

We pray this will be your Merriest Christmas ever, Mele Kalikimaka!

I Apologize

Several months ago, an acquaintance hurt my feelings. The how, what, when is not critical to the point I want to make here. Weeks later (at the prompting of a mutual friend) she sent me an email listing all her reasons why she hurt my feelings. Without going into irrelevant detail, the email was basically made up of, "Things have been hard for me." and "I've been dealing with some stuff." The email had the underlying tones of an apology; however, her email consisted of all her hardships but not how her reaction to her hardships hurt me as well as other innocent bystanders.

For those of you who are wondering, she doesn't follow my blog and most likely will never read this. However, if she happens to stumble on it...just think of all the people who have been set free because of this situation! Always jump on a chance to work things out for good!

My first response to her email was, learn how to apologize. Then I read the blog I wrote on forgiveness. {Smile} When I stand praying, I first forgive anyone and refuse to hold a grudge so that my Father in Heaven will forgive me also. (Mark 11:25) I made the correct choice! His grace is sufficient for me! (2 Corinthians 12:9)

I didn't return an email stating she should learn how to apologize. Thankfully, I wasn't even tempted to; however, if she could've taken a joke at that point...I would've just for the humor factor. But since I hardly knew her...I wasn't willing to risk how she might respond and possibly fuel the wrong momentum. I chalked it off for being what it was and not thinking another thing about it except...through my excitement thought, "There has got to be a great blog in here somewhere!"

I've read Dr. Larry Ollison's Book, Breaking the Cycle of Offense...twice. I've learned how to refuse offense and walk in freedom; however, this situation made made me think.

I started thinking, "I apologize." What does that mean exactly? One definition I found documented regretful acknowledgment of a fault or offense. A'hah! Regretful acknowledgement of a fault or offense. That's the part of the email that was missing! She went into great detail of all the reasons why she did what she did; however, never once considered how to clean up the mess for the one's left in her wake. In other words, she considered her feelings while failing to consider the feelings of everyone in her radius.

Next step...I was convinced I must write a blog on how to effectively apologize! Moments later...realize someone has probably already done that. Why reinvent the wheel when there is GOOGLE! The following link has insightful information on apologizing effectively.

http://words4mind.blogspot.com/2008/05/5-steps-to-effective-apology.html#!/2008/05/5-steps-to-effective-apology.html

If the link fails to work, I've copy and pasted it's contents below for your convenience.

5 Steps to an Effective Apology

1. Make it genuine - Anyone can spot a false apology and it will do more harm than good. A genuine apology is aimed solely at taking responsibility and overcoming a disturbance. There are no hidden obligations or expectations attached.

2.Don’t justify your actions - If you are busy explaining why you did what you did, it will start to sound like you aren’t apologizing at all, that you aren’t ready to take responsibility. A brief explanation may help understanding, while a justification may just fuel the disturbance.

3.Make a commitment to change - If you can’t confirm that you mean to improve, then you aren’t committed to an apology. If you aren’t committed to changing your habit of getting home late, don’t say “Sorry I am home late”. This will be a hollow and ineffective apology. You are better off thanking the other person, “Thanks for putting up with me coming home so late. I appreciate it” and taking it from there.

4.Phrased you apology carefully - Make sure the other person knows why you are apologizing. “I was passing by so I thought I’d drop in and say sorry” is a lot different to “I wanted to come and apologize because I really do care about this relationship”. Don’t fake it. If you have a good reason to keep the relationship alive the other person will want to hear it.

5.Be prepared for an awkward conclusion - While sometimes an apology is followed straight away by a counter apology and peace and flowers and little birds carrying banners of love through the air, not everyone reacts this way. Some people will behave indifferently, some will behave coldly, and some will react in a downright hostile way. This is out of your control. You have made the step to apologize. Doing it in a productive way is the best you can do. Maybe the other person will appreciate it now, later, or never. No matter what, you have done your bit and you can relax. The rest is up to them.

Written by Campus Fest

Side note: A few weeks ago, I had to apologize to a dear, sweet, long time friend. I had had a meltdown on some issues I was trying to resolve. I was basically thinking out loud, I said too much and went too far. Once the LORD prompted my heart to apologize to her she did the most amazing thing. She had every right to give me a verbal smack down. I deserved it. But instead, she comforted me and thanked me for being real. She had all right to point out everything I said wrong and "put me in my place". But instead, she restored me gently. (Galations 6:1) As a result, I had an amazing break through in my life and it was instantaneous! The windows of Heaven burst open in a very critical area of my life! 

So, the next time you are in a position to apologize to someone, consider this information. And, if you are helping someone work out an apology, this is a great resource. Or, if someone apologizes to you, Galations 6:1 them...it will be a win-win every time!

A Few of my BFFs

Today I discovered I am a gadget girl. I never really thought of myself as such until a friend laughed at me for buying Christmas presents for Ms. Martha, my Roomba. She totally deserves new brushes, rollers and filters for Christmas. (My Roomba...not Kate, my laughing friend...love ya Katester! Ok...if Kate wants a brush, I will buy her one.) I've already placed Ms. Martha's order. Her gifts are on their on their way.

Ms. Martha is one of my BFFs because:

• She's always there when I need her.
• She makes my life easier.
• When she needs help (gets stuck, sucks up something or needs charging) she says what she means and means what she says by very nicely and quickly pinpointing the problem and asking for help.
• She cleans my floors.

Another of my gadgets is my new Dyson. It is so cool. It is sleek and yellow and cleans baseboards like nobodies business. It even sounds cool as I'm connecting its attachments. I like clean baseboards. Prior to my Dyson, I cleaned my white baseboards while down on my hands and knees using a baby wipe. No more, the ball dude is a genius! I wonder what he wants for Christmas.

My BFF list would not be complete without my Vitamix! I drink fruit/vege/herbal/seed/berry smoothies at least once a day. Throw enough berries in a Vitamix and you can mask the flavor of anything! What a great way to "hide" nutritional food that may be hard to swallow. No pun intended.

The newest member on my list is my Shark Steam Cleaner. It cleans...AND...disinfects...at the same time! It makes my floors look brand new. I can feel the disinfecting power as the steam rises...exhilarating!

Then there is my Temperpedic. After a full day of home school, running my girls to their extra cirricular classes and completing all my other duties as assigned...my Temperpedic really helps me rest well. When we bought it I wondered if it would be as good as people say it is. If you've ever wondered that...wonder no more! It is beyond everything people say it is!

Last on my list is my iPad which has a really cool cover. Not all covers are created equal. My iPad is light, portable, does almost everything that my laptop does plus...let's me pin like a professional. If you don't know what pinning is, ask...then follow me so I can follow you...PINquiring minds need to know. Thanks April!

I haven't actually named any of my gadgets, except Ms Martha. And I haven't bought any of them Christmas gifts except her. I didn't want too get weird {tee hee hee}.

Those who know me are probably wondering why my Canon EOS 7d didn't make my BFF list. That...my friends...would be because it deserves a blog of its own. If you have one, you understand. Nuff...said.

My gadgets, specifically Ms. Martha, really made me think about Proverbs 18:24. A man who has friends must himself be friendly.

I'm going to show myself friendly this Christmas season by:

• Being available when my friends need me.
• Making my friend's lives easier.
• Asking for help if I need it.
• Saying what I mean and meaning what I say.
• And if needed, I will clean some floors.

Mele Kalikimaka!

Momentum

So many people have asked me how I gain control over my thought life. God set us up! Our thought life has a momentum and this is how we use that momentum to our advantage!

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praise worthy meditate on these things. The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:8, 9)

Personally, I believe there are so many whatevers to give us time to process the information. If I am mad or sad, I can’t get through the whole scripture without the momentum changing into joy and gladness! Oftentimes, I stop and think…wait, what was I thinking again?

*Likes shiny objects*

Can you imagine the Amplified Version of that scripture? I didn’t even look! Some day if I ever get really mad and this version doesn’t work for me, I will refer to the Amplified Version. That’ll get the job done. *grin*

Let’s look at the end of that scripture again. “And the God of peace will be with you.” Whoa-Ho-Ho, and the God of peace…will be…with me! Talk about momentum! That in and of itself is enough motivation!

I once heard Brother Keith Moore at Faith Life Church in Branson Missouri teach on this scripture. He taught to make every thought qualify with every point of this scripture. In other words, something may be true; however, if it is not lovely don’t meditate on it.

I refute arguments and theories and reasonings and every proud and lofty thing that sets itself up against the true knowledge of God; and I lead every thought and purpose away captive into the obedience of Christ. (2 Corinthians 10:4-6) Who leads my thoughts? I lead my thoughts! How many thoughts? Every thought! I am the boss of my thoughts! Sometimes I have to say, “I will-I will-I will take every thought-every thought- every thought captive!

No matter what people may say to me or do to me, since He be for me who can be against me?! (Romans 8:31) He loves me with a steadfast love! (Psalm 36:7) He never leaves or forsakes me so I am strong and courageous! (Deuteronomy 31:6)

Does this always work? Yes, always. Maybe not the first time I follow the process so if necessary, I keep repeating the process until I reach the “other side”!

Am I perfect in this? Shoots no! Do I want to slap people? I sure do! But instead, I ask the Holy Spirit to help me in my weakness and He has never failed me! (Romans 8:26)

To summarize:

1.    Qualify every thought
2.    Lead every thought captive.
3.    And is the above fails, simply say,

“Father, I love you and I want to obey your commands but I’m weak in this right now. Please help me in my weakness as I submit my spirit to your precious Holy Spirit in the name of your Son, Jesus.

The In-laws

“I will be a Father to you, and you shall be my sons and daughters, says the LORD Almighty.” (2 Corinthians 6:18)

When a loving, successful, intelligent gentleman asked me for my daughter's hand in marriage, I asked him to stand in agreement with me. He and I know, Jesus said when we agree about anything, we can ask for it and it will be done for us by our Father in Heaven! (Matthew 18:19)

He and I committed from the start to have a relationship independent of everyone else. We agreed when I had an issue arise regarding him, I promised to discuss it directly with him. He promised me the same. We understood there would be issues. We committed there would be no unresolved issues. We both committed to not use my daughter as a middle man. (Matthew 18:15)

He and I have a unique relationship that I value deeply. He can confide in me. He can seek me for counsel and prayer. He isn’t an outsider. He is like a son to me. I do not replace his mother, but I am like a mother to him. We are good friends. Our relationship is about relationship and not about the law. We aren’t connected by law, we are connected by love.

I’ve heard professional counselors advise married couples to handle their in-laws through the blood relative. For example, if the husband has issue with his mother-in-law, he is to take the issue to his wife and his wife is to resolve the issue with her mother. I understand the logic in that. But to me, the sound of that just screams division. I understand professional counselors are trained and experienced; therefore, I will leave all marital counseling in their hands. However, our o’hana has agreed on a different approach. As for me and my house, we have direct relationship with one another in Him.

Jesus has provided a way to direct relationship with our Heavenly Father! (John 14:6) We directly approach our Father when issues arise. (John 16:23) Many are the afflictions of the righteous but God delivers us out of them all! (Psalm 34:19) Praise God nothing can separate us from His love! (Romans 8:38-39) He is our Father! We are His sons & daughters! God is love and His love never fails! (1 John 4:8)

We are not connected to Him by law. We are connected to Him by love!

I Just Saw Two Whole Hearts!

You will seek me and you will find me when you seek me with your whole heart. (Jeremiah 29:13)

My oldest daughter and I were pregnant at the same time. As awkward as that may seem to some, it has been one of the most amazing blessings and fun times of my life.

The children who we delivered, who are less than three months apart, pursue one another more than anyone I have ever experienced. When Gracie and Caley spend the night together, they insure they wake up two or three hours earlier than normal just so they can be together. To elaborate, two or three hours earlier than normal falls within the range of 4:00 a.m. to 6:00 a.m. To further elaborate, that is very early.

Their excitement doesn’t fade. If they spend a week together every day is spent staying up as late as possible and they are up again early every morning. Even when they are very tired, there is something that rises up and overrides their fatigue because they don’t want to lose any time with one another. When it is time for them to go to their own homes, they cry for one another and say, “But we didn’t even have enough time to play…”

It is highly uncommon for them to have a squabble but when they do, I tell them to separate for ½ hour. They both cry and plead with me not to separate them. Whatever the offense was, it is immediately overridden by the possible threat of them being separated. That’s true forgiveness!

When they are apart (we live in different towns) they draw pictures for one another, write each other notes, and save them for when they are reunited.

Last night, we watched a parade together then I took Gracie to a food court and we were waiting for my oldest daughter to bring Caley so we could have dinner. Gracie said, “I am just so excited! I’m just going to sit here and watch the door until Caley comes in!” And, she did.

When we walk together, they insure they are holding hands. When we eat, they insure they are sitting together. At the ripe age of six, they have already devised elaborate plans on how they are going to live together when they grow up. Currently, that plan includes sharing their home with lots of guinea pigs.

They consistently leave the family circle to spend one on one time with each other. Their relationship is quite amazing and one I find difficult to define.

I’m an early riser, today I was up before 6:00 a.m. True to form, Gracie and Caley were up playing quietly in the living room and had been for an undetermined amount of time. They had shut my bedroom door. I’m unsure if they wanted me to be uninterrupted or if they wanted to be uninterrupted.

Unbeknownst to them, I quietly observed them playing and my heart remembered Jeremiah 29:13, “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” I wondered, had I ever sought God the way Gracie and Caley seek one another? I also wondered, had I ever worked as hard at my relationships as they do theirs?  Has my excitement about my relationship with Jesus ever faded?

Mahalo nui loa for the lesson girls, I'm going to go do some wholehearted seeking now.

Had a Terrible Fight this A.M.

Forewarning: 
Grammatically Correct People, you may want to forego this post!
I hear cringes already!

Or just read it like I wrote it, from my heart. It’s ok, I have a college degree and I really do know how to use it…just choosing not to use it today, freedom!
Yesterday, one of my high school buddies reminded me, we don’t always have to be in perfection mode.

Thanks Sandy…you rawk!

Some days I just gotta throw down, bust out and blog, K? K. Okay!

The fight started off early and caught me off guard…not cool!
I even name called…eeeek! But I didn’t go as far as to blame shift, yay!

The fight was against a formable opponent…myself.

I had planned to go to the gym. I needed four days this week and today is my fourth day. When much to my surprise, my flesh screamed, “I don’t feel like going to the gym today!” I am very organized and today is a gym day! But I was so tempted to entertain the thought of not following through with my plan.

But I declared there will be no little foxes here! I said, “Flesh, shut up! Don't be a dirty lazy hound dog! Git' urself up & GO”. When I git aggravated my Okie accent becomes dominate! I said, “You are the temple of the Holy Ghost! You will glorify God!” (1 Cor 6:19 & 20) I went on to say, “I don't keer (care..gotta be Okie to get that...maybe a lil Texan...I grew up near the Red River so I proclaim to be an honorary Texan! Plus I married a Texan so that makes me a shoo-in. Sayz me!)...if you don't feel like going, you are going! And if you mess with me, you will do double!"

Guess who won?

“Yeaaaa…flesh, that's what I thought you said”.

Walk’n in Victory…in every area of my life…one step at a time!